Immune systems are for pussies and Amsterdam is on the mind

I'm sick again. I don't know why this keeps happening, but I haven't been "well" in like - 3 months. Every time I think I get better, a week later my throat hurts and I'm coughing non-stop again and it's about time that this bullshit is over! I'll go to the doctor tomorrow, they'll scold me for smoking cigarettes (which I haven't done in a few days) and then they'll give me some medicine that will hopefully make me better for good. I really don't have time to be sick. There's too much stuff going on. And right now it's 6:30am. I'm awake because for the past 2 days I've passed out on my couch at 10:30/11p and then I keep waking up coughing and then falling back asleep so now I'm sleepy but having trouble passing back out. This is lame.

I know I said that I'd blog all about Amsterdam, but since that was a week ago, I decided to do one big recap instead of a play by play. So, here goes.

I already blogged about day one, and I actually wrote a blog entry for day two without posting it (internet issues in the hotel). Day two involved me realizing that I had gone to a foreign country, a totally unknown city, all by myself. I was kind of panicking a little bit, not enough to make me upset, but enough to make me apprehensive. Here's an excerpt!

My problem is this. I didn’t plan out my days. I didn’t set a schedule for myself. So tomorrow, at breakfast, I will sit down with my computer and set an itinerary. It’s going to start with a visit to the iamsterdam office, where I will buy an iamsterdam card to ride the trams for free and get free/discounted museum tickets. Afterwards, I will take a city tour (which I intended on doing today) that will last approx 3 hours. I’ll then hop a tram and visit the Van Gogh, Rijksmuseum, and the Rembrandt museums. I’ll go back to the hotel, change, grab a drink, and head to the Melkweg to see Yeasayer. After that, I will probably be sufficiently exhausted, and maybe fucked up enough to drunkenly flirt with some guy (not one of the creep streetwalkers though).

This was my decision. I wanted to go somewhere alone. I anticipated on being alone, so I just have to keep myself occupied and excited. I had a good day today, don’t get me wrong. I explored. I’m just a little apprehensive about my upcoming days.

Also, I’ve blown a fuse twice today in my hotel room. So much for hairdryers and straighteners – that shit ain’t gonna fly. They fixed it this afternoon, but I did it the second time a few hours ago (around 11:30pm) so I’ll just ask them to fix it again in the morning. Right now, my room is very dark.

They fixed the electricity in my room very quickly - so that was good. And the next day, I did what I said I was going to do! Well, minus the tour. I figured out the tram system, which proved to be very convenient. I walked to the Rembrandt museum and was in the best mood ever! I had smoked a rather large joint before hand and the weather was beautiful that day. The sun was out, the sky was blue, there was no rain, and it was perfect. On the way to the museum, I stopped and had an espresso and people-watched for about 20 minutes on the sidewalk in front of a cafe.

I made my way to the Rembrandt and the Rijksmuseum, but after that it was already 6 and raining (museums closed at 6) so I went back to Central Station to go eat dinner and get ready to see Yeasayer. Walking back to my hotel, I picked an Italian restaurant to have dinner at. Prior to this I had been really apprehensive about eating in a restaurant alone. Today, however, I was in a good mood, I was hungry, and I had my book with me, so I was dining alone! As soon as I sat down, the host at the restaurant started chatting with me. He was very nice, probably Italian, but had mostly a Dutch accent. He also had very unfortunate facial hair, a soul-patch that grew to hang off of his chin - ew. I ordered a glass of wine and a pizza, attempted to read a little bit, but this guy kept coming over to chat. I put the book away and had a nice little conversation. Smoked a few cigarettes, ordered another glass of wine, ate a DELICIOUS pizza, then had an Irish coffee. I had a nice little buzz going (okay, I was a little drunk) and I was very full of delicious food. I told the restaurant guy that I was going to the Melkweg that night, and he told me that he was going to be at a bar in that area, so I should meet him after the show. I said sure, gave him my number, and he walked me out of the restaurant and said goodbye, and that he really wanted to see me later. Yay!

I only had about 5 minutes to think about the possibility of meeting up with this guy, because I had only gone about 6 feet when a guy comes up behind me and offers to fix my jacket for me (it was caught on my bag strap). He's an older guy (salt & pepper hair) with a heavy Italian accent. He asks if he can walk with me and we start chatting. He's very flirty, but not sleazy, and I'm drunk and in a great mood so whatevs! We get back to the hotel and I say that I have to go up and change, so he says "Okay, I'll wait for you" - I say that's fine (thinking in the back of my head that I could probably leave the back way and not see him after) and go change. I'm sitting on the bed in my room thinking "do I go meet this guy? mmmmmmmm..... fuck it, sure." so I go back downstairs and he's waiting at the bar. He asks if he can go to the show with me, I say it's 15 euros, but he can if he wants to. He asks if the guy at the restaurant was my boyfriend (he saw him talk to me outside) and I said no, I just met him tonight. He asks if I have a lot of guys just come up and talk to me, I say, honestly, yeah - haha. At that point in time, I had had quite a few guys come up and talk to me on the street. So he says "well, I'll do something that none of these guys have done" and I reply "oh yeah? what's that?" - at this point, he takes my hand and we cross the street. He kisses me 10 minutes later. We danced together at the show, and then had sex all night back at my hotel. His name is Sinai, and I spent the rest of my Amsterdam trip with him.

My three day relationship with Sinai is one of the most surreal things that's ever happened to me. It was seriously one of those times when you're like "this is just like the movies!" and it's hard to really come to terms with the fact that it's totally happening in real life too. He was a really great boyfriend from Tuesday night until he took me to the airport Friday afternoon. He was GREAT in bed. He showed me where to buy the best weed, and we smoked 3 and a half grams in 2 and a half days. We had a fabulous dinner at an Indonesian restaurant. He talked about how he wants me to move to Spain with him, and we can live on a farmhouse and have four kids and he'll cook for us every day (he's a chef!). He was very smitten with me. I was smitten as well, but I took a lot of joy in the fact that it was so temporary. Also, the whole time I just kept thinking "damn! this is crazy!" I miss him like I miss Amsterdam. I just miss the whole experience, but I don't know if I plan on meeting him in Spain ever. Also, I was 25 this whole time (he was 32!) so that's gonna be hard news to break later.

I came back home with a renewed sense of self. My self esteem was through the roof! I felt happy and sexy and glad to be home. I mean, who wouldn't feel awesome after that? So basically, traveling alone is a great idea, even if it takes you a while to get used to it. In the end, you get to have lots of sex with hot Italians and you don't have to answer to anybody. Thanks Amsterdam. You were just what I needed.

Also, my iPhone loved Amsterdam so much, it decided to stay. It was a little upsetting, but I understand. I'll have to replace it, but I wish my iPhone a happy life in Holland!